If you've been keeping up to date on Indian affairs, you'll have seen the whole hullaballoo about corruption - the newspeople can't seem to get enough of it. First there was Anna Hazare, doing his Gandhi 2 thing. Now there's this Baba Ramdev character, sort of like Rasputin without the sexiness. He claims to be able to cure AIDS by breathing exercises or something of the sort. Surely, getting rid of corruption is child's play, then? Anyway, I'd love to see the government call their bluff - if you starve to death, we'll pass the anti-corruption bill. How's that for a bit of reverse blackmail?
What is corruption, though? At it's simplest, it's taking money to get something done. So how's that different from paying a plumber to unblock a drain? Because it's not stated up front. So maybe it should be stated up front. Think about it. Walk into a government office, and you'd see a tarriff of charges, for "special services", or "expedited delivery", to be paid "directly to functionary".
After all, that's how some governments deal with practices they don't like, but can't stamp out either - by legalising them. Like prostitution, in some countries. Can't beat 'em, so join 'em. And tax them, into the bargain. That way, everybody's happy. Of course, taking a cut from a prostitute's pay makes the government a pimp (or is it a madam?), but they've been called worse...
So let's legalise it. Everybody does it, might as well make it open, above board, and most importantly, taxable (let's avoid the issue of corrupt tax collectors for now...). Just imagine how much faster everything would move once everybody knows they need to pay a bribe to "expedite" matters. Companies could budget for it. Governent employees could set up bribe collection pools. Banks wwould have ATMs next to all government offices, dispensing cash briskly (and charge a premium for each withdrawal). Am I clever, or what?
And another thing - Why do countries like India always get a bad rap for corruption? I mean, I have to pay the telecom company here in the UK extra if I want faster broadband, although they advertise it like everybody's entitled to it. Or pay more to the parcel guys for "express delivery". Or pay more for a train ticket at the last minute, when I'm desperate to get somewhere. That's corruption too - taking advantage of someone's urgent need to pry some money out of them. The thing is, it's all institutionalised here in the west, with people working in an institutionally corrupt system. Whereas in countries like India, it's a cottage industry - every man for himself. And Indians are nothing if not entrepreneurs!
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2 comments:
walking through victoria market in melbourne a few months ago, i saw this giant cop with a shaved head taking his 'hafta' from an asian lady at one of the stalls. i recognized what was going on of course. i am from india!
which brings me to the point about western countries labeling us 'corrupt'. sure we are. we are like this only!
the origins of bribes was our patented 'baksheesh', a token something we handed out for a job well done... it may have begun as a royal handout, but the british made it their own while they were in india.and the more menial the job, the surer the baksheesh.
like business practices grow/evolve, the baksheesh, over a period of time became an obligation rather than gratis. a little further into its evolution, it became a surly demand. then, it kept up with inflation...all this while, the practice was upwardly mobile, moving from the menial to the echelons of power.
what we have now is the highly evolved, refined reality called bribery. big deal. and lehman brothers grew too!
at restaurants, we pay service charges. if you wish to eat here, you better cough up. highways have toll booths. pay up, or get onto the cart track. malls have car parks. pay up or go shop in that kneee-deep-in-slush market downtown.
much as i hate paying a bribe before bowing to the inevitability, i look at this whole anti-corruption thing with a reasonable amount of scepticism. sure, its a great thing to do periodically...a rally, a fast,and if the corporates get to it, a run, if the tea estates get to it, a jamboree, a summer sale!
besides, who on earth would want to miss the anna hazare sideshow? lets admit it, it was more fun than that american preacher's rapture plans.
it would be a good idea if this whole anti corruption thing could be tied up with a national cultural festival (hybrid,certainly)...'rock of conscience' for instance, a festival of folk rock where the bauls, the various gharanas. a r rahman (cant leave him out) and that u2 chap can all get together and caterwaul about an inner cleansing.
i am not talking about bowel movement. that, we will leave to the advanced yoga of baba ramdev.
sunu charles
Sunu - I've said it before and I'll say it again - you need to put some of this stuff on a blog of your own!
You're completely right about the evolution of baksheesh - I've seen this evolution take place even in individuals - when they first work for you/ do something for you, it's asked for in a sheepish, forelock-tugging way. Then it becomes a "polite reminder", and finally just a shade short of "right, hand it over now".
And regarding what you witnessed in Melbourne..."people power" in action - take back the power to bribe from the corporations!
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